Written Word Wednesday

Since I've finished off the Perfume Collector I've moved on to the next novel: California by Edan Lepucki. The story is set in a post-apocalyptic world in the view of a couple trying to survive in the wilderness in California. Frida believes she is pregnant and the two made a decision to try to find other people and they stumble upon a settlement. But Cal and Frida realize there are certain dangers within the community and can't help but wonder if they were better off where they were.

This novel is an easy read and it has a steady pace. It switches back and forth between Frida's and Cal's point of view. There are a few good characters that are unique and intriguing. A few twists in the story encourages you to turn the pages to see what happens next. In a way, it is thought-provoking too. I would recommend this for someone who enjoys a story of adventure.

Here is an excerpt from California.

On the map, their destination had been a stretch of green, as if they would be living on a golf course. No freeways nearby, or any roads, really: those had been left to rot years before. Friday had given this place a secret name, the afterlife, and on their journey, when they were forced to hide in abandoned rest stops, or when they'd filled the car with the last gasoline, this place had beckoned. In her mind it was a township, and Cal was the mayor. She was the mayor's wife.
    Of course it was nothing like that. The forest had not been expecting them. If anything, it had tried to throw them out, again and again. But they had stayed, perhaps even prospered. Now Frida could only laugh at the memory of herself, over two years ago: dragging a duffel bag behind her with a groan, her nails bitten to shit, her stomach roiling. Grime like she'd never imagined. Even her knees had smelled.
    She thought it would be easier once they arrived; she should have known better. The work didn't even then; if anything, it got worse, and for months the exhaustion and fear tick-ticked in her body like a dealer shuffling cards. At night, the darkness gave her a skinned-alive feeling, and she longed for her old childhood bed. For a bed, period.
    She had packed some things to comfort herself: the dead Device, a matchbook from their favorite bar. Cal later called them her artifacts. In a world so disconnected from the past, her attachment to these objects had been her only strategy for remaining sane. It still was.

Marriage Mondays

One of the many lessons I've learned about being married is you have to pick your battles.

Well, this is a lesson I'm still learning. A few times that I've been mad about something to the point that I want to go at him swinging (not physically) and it results with me on my butt, trying to figure out what just happened.

Last night was a good example. We were having a discussion (fight) about the fact that when I do the dishes I don't always put them away in their 'correct' spot. my husband got upset because I put a silver fork with the bin that holds our red utensils. It was an honest mistake but to him it was seen as lazy.

I told him he's being dramatic and overly OCD.

Then he makes a point (unfortunately) when I get mad at him for not putting his laundry 'away'. He'll take his freshly clean laundry, fold them up, and puts them next to his dresser but he doesn't put them 'away'. This irks me because you would think someone who is OCD would take the time to put his laundry away properly. My husband said this is how he feels with me and dishes.

I got what he was saying and I, after doing a breathing exercise when I realized I've lost this fight, admitted he was right and I will try better as long as he tries to do his part.

So...what have I learned? When I want to fight my husband (and hope to win) I better have ammo.

Marriage Monday

One of the numerous reasons I love being married is knowing that you are not alone.

You and your spouse make decisions and whatever happens you have each other, supporting each other.

For a while Jared and I have been thinking of the next chapter of our lives. I have mixed feelings about it but I am reassured from the fact that I'm not doing it alone; I have my loving husband beside me.

To explain, my husband found out that he is going to be deployed around March of next year. When he brought it up to me my first thought was 'baby?' We've mulled it over for a few days and had an argument about so we end up dropping the subject for a while and get back to it later.

We came back to the subject of baby a few days ago and came to an agreement. What's most important to us is that Jared is home for his first child and I want him there with me when I'm 'popping' the baby out as well.

With that said we agreed we will try to have a baby within a two month period (starting now). If we don't get lucky then we'll wait until late December/early January when I'll be ready to 'pop' when Jared gets back.

I'm excited but scared. But I have Jared and that's all I need.

Farm Friday

I finally fixed the problem with my computer and able to upload some photos of the 'farm'. Hope you enjoy! Have a lovely weekend.

This is what I usually see when I come outside to check up on everyone.

 

the babies

 

my garden is slowly coming along

those naughty, naughty goats

Written Word Wednesday

Eva turned to face her. 'So you want me to do you a favour?'
   'A favour?' Yvonne's eyes flared. 
   'What price is your husband's company or your reputation, Madam Hiver?' She smiled softly. 'I'll consider it, on one condition. I want you to do something for me.' 
   'And what's that?'
   'Andre Valmont. I want Hiver to hire him. I want you to ensure he's protected and classified as essential wartime personnel to the company.'
   Yvonne's eyes narrowed. She folded her arms across her chest. 'We're not hiring anyone. Especially not Jews.'
   'He's a world-class perfumer. A genius. Just the kind of visionary Hiver needs.'
   'I don't know what you expect me to do.'
   'What if he created a perfume for Hiver?' Eva persisted. 'One that was sold exclusively under the Hiver name. Then it would prove he was essential to the future of the company.' 
   'The Nazis have taken over our factories,' Yvonne explained, exasperated. 'We're not producing cosmetics right now. We're making nylon for parachutes and God know what else!'
   'We could make it, Andre and I-in the shop. We still have supplies. We could produce the formulation in small batches. Your products are still be sold.'
   'It's old stock and it's running out fast. The longer this war lasts the more precarious our position becomes.'
   'Yes, but what if, during France's darkest hour, Hiver delivers, against all odds, a new perfume. Can you imagine what it would mean to an ordinary woman, at a time like this? Just that something beautiful is being created, that it exists-something uniquely French. What's more quintessentially French than perfume? Do you think that hope has a fragrance? Allegiance? Loyalty? And the very fact that you were producing it without factories, in spite of the Germans, would spark imagination. It would seem like an exquisite act of patriotism.'
   Yvonne pursed her lips again, said nothing.
   Thinking aloud, Eva continued. 'The bottle should have a picture of the Eiffel Tower on it.'
   'And what will you call it?'
   'Mon Coeur. Now, always, forever.'




Her shoulders relaxed, the tensions in her face eased. 'Good, then.' She sighed, taking another drag. 'Oh, and this might help you.' Reaching forward, she opened the prayer book. Inside there was a newspaper clipping folded into the front cover. She took it out and handed it to him.
   It was obviously some years old, cut out from an English publication. It showed a photograph of three young debutantes, standing on a grand marble stairway, dressed in white gowns. Looking at the caption, Edouard matched the face of the first young woman with the name on the bequest. 'Is this her?' She was so much younger than he anticipated. 'A lovely girl,' he added, looking up. 'Is she a relative of yours?'
   Madam d'Orsey was quiet for a moment. 'I don't think that matters,' she decided.
   Suddenly, a smile spread across her face, softening her features, brandishing the pain in her eyes. And when she spoke, he caught in the warmth of something confident and sure, like pride, in her voice. 
   'The past is over,' she decided.
   Her shoulders fell, as if a great weight had dissolved. 
   'What matters now, all that matters now, is what Grace Munroe chooses to do next.'


Excerpts from The Perfume Collector.

Marriage Monday

Every morning I read my two devotionals, one for studying the bible the other about marriage. It is from the second that I learned a very good lesson that I felt I needed to share it.

The lesson was regarding respectful communication. This is a lesson that I am constantly learning. There are times when I become angry and want to lash out at him. Or I've become hurt by a comment and want to shut down.

This is not the way to solve problems, I have learned. The devotional lesson asked a few questions about how you interact with your spouse during a fight or discussion. Do you cut them off while they speak? Do you share your needs in the form of requests or demands?

Chapman stated that you must change your communication skills that benefits both yourself and your spouse and in a respectful and loving manner.

I'm now learning to be slow to my anger and not allow it to control my actions and to speak more respectfully. I can already tell it makes a difference in our conversations. Even my husband is learning to speak more kindly during our discussions.

I highly recommend the The One Year Love Language Minute Devotional by Gary Chapman.

Farm Friday

My garden is sprouting! So far I have carrots, potatoes, garlic, spinach, and radishes in the ground. I have cherry tomatoes, brandywines, and sweet peppers starting indoors. I'm so thrilled to see something coming out of the ground. I honestly didn't expect it to be that easy.

The goats are learning to trust us...slightly. They do come when I reach my hand out, especially when I have grains. They love their grains and hay.

The chickens are fun to watch and we are getting 6 eggs on average daily. Two days ago we got 9 eggs out of our 9 hens.

The chicks are now permanently outside but we have taken our dog's kennel and put it outside in the chicken's area. They are getting picked on by the older hens so until they get a little bit bigger the babies are staying in the kennel.


They are so cute when they run; they look like baby t-rex. I call them my baby dinosaurs.

 When I'm out in the yard they follow me around; it's so adorable. They still each chick feed but they're trying out new things. I'll toss out bread or pineapple and some will try it out almost immediately while some others are skeptical and content with their dirt and chick feed.

*I would have posted photos but for some reason they're not uploading from my phone. Maybe next time.*

Happy Weekend!

Written Word Wednesday

"...She appeared at the Grand Casino late one evening, dressed in a gold silk gown, her hair twisted inside a matching turban, escorted by Gotti and a coterie of his friends. She spoke very little French and almost no Italian and as a result seemed sullen in comparison to her companions, smoking steadily, rolling her eyes when autograph seekers approached, scanning the room nervously for more when they disappeared. 
    It was a sweltering, humid evening. Eva arrived later, after a dance competition that she had entered with an Argentinian polo star. Lamb was doing rather well that evening without her. 
    Valmont was waiting at a table on his own, watching for her. From where he was seated, off to one side, he had a clear view. He saw Eva enter, pausing at the doorway, surveying the scene.
    Her eyes rested on the centre craps table, where Gotti was attempting to impress his new lover by placing higher and higher bets. Eva watched as he urged her to blow on his dice for good luck; Kay Waverley, in all her golden glory, hung from his arm, distracted and bored. 
    There was something about Eva's face, her level of concentration, that stuck Valmont. Her energy had always been mercurial, uneasy and agitated. But right then, right there, she solidified. Her focus, on Gotti and especially on Kay Waverley, sharpened into a fixed stare. It was as if she'd suddenly spotted something she'd been searching for, for a very long time. He didn't realize it until much later, but in that brief, unguarded moment, Valmont observed a complete shift in Eva's personality. Nothing about her changed outwardly, but internally, a decision had been made. In that moment, she turned away from him, towards a separate, shadowy agenda of her own.




Rummaging in his coat pocket, he took out a packet of cigarettes and lit one. 'Look, I've always been straight with you, Dorsey. And now you owe me, quite a bit.' 
   'But it's different now. She's here now.'
    He leaned in. 'How are you going to look after a baby on your own? Think about it. Once you get past the romance of it, what's it going to be like day to day? Where are you going to live? How are you going to make ends meet? Who do you think is going to hire an unmarried girl with a baby in tow?' He exhaled a long stream of smoke.
   'Do you want to die in poverty and have your little girl do the same?'
   'Stop it!' She turned her face away. 'It doesn't have to be that way.'
   'No, it doesn't. Listen to me-I have a sister. Lovely, accomplished. Kingd. Married to a good man, a war hero. They have no children. But they do have a large house, money, and social position-something money can't buy.'  
   'Please!' She took his hand. 'Give me some time.'
   'We haven't got time.' He shook her off. 'How do you think we've been living up till now? For God's sake! If I don't win tomorrow, we'll get kicked out-I can't even pay the rent.' He closed his eyes, took a deep breath.
   'You don't have to give her up for ever,' he pointed out, calmer now. 'Just until you've got yourself back on your feet. You come to Europe with me and we make some real money. The casinos there are sagging with millionaires. And when we've had enough, we come back.'
   He stroked her hair, pushing gently back from her face. 'And you, my dear, will have enough money to buy our own house with a garden, pay for good schools and beautiful frocks. You'll be a rich woman, able to give her anything she needs or wants. But nothing is free, Dorsey. You know that. Besides, she's only a baby. She won't remember who looked after her when she was tiny.'
   'I will.' 
   'Maybe, but you owe me. I've looked after you for quite a while now.'


  
Excerpts from The Perfume Collector.

Marriage Monday

A couple of nights ago, while we were preparing for bed

Jared mentioned to me that one of our good friends ranked up (he's military) and I was thrilled. But then I remembered something else and became sad (he's divorcing his wife). Then we started a conversation about marriages that have failed and why we thought they did.

It wasn't like we were talking about other people's failed marriages to make us feel good about ours and be cruel. In my perspective, I was learning from other people's mistakes. For example, the first couple I've met through Jared didn't have a great marriage and divorced. He was like 22 or 23 and the wife was 19. They were both so young and still needed a lot of maturing before committing themselves to something as big as marriage (again, my perspective).

Another example included a friend of Jared's back when he was stationed in England. The guy proposed to his girlfriend pretty much on a whim. After a while he was having second thoughts and was talking to Jared about it. Jared told him and explained to him if he was having second thoughts then you are not doing yourself and your future spouse a favor if you are not sure. In the end, the guy married his fiancé; sure enough they got divorced.

I'm not saying that Jared and I have it all figured out(because we don't) but I can't help but feel blessed that we both try to make smart decisions and when we do make a choice we are very sure it's what we want. I feel blessed to have a partner who considers our wellbeing  in every decision he makes and I try to do the same as well.

So it's good to learn from other people's mistakes but be humbled by them at the same time. It can save you a lot of trouble and heartache in the future.

Starting All Over...Again...UGH

Soo...

The reason you have not heard from me all week is because I've been job hunting and busy with dealing with my current issue.

Last Friday, my manager decided to let me go. She explained to me, and I noticed she was uncomfortable and upset in the process, that she had found someone with over twenty years of pool company experience and they, she and her husband, decided to take her on. My managers have another business in Costa Rica where they tend to spend a few weeks every now and then traveling there as well. They felt the need to have someone holding down the fort in their pool company and knows what their doing. I understand that completely and don't blame them on this.

But I'm kinda pissed over how it was done. I was not given a head's up about what was going on. All of last week my manager was checking up this person's references and background check, etc. and did not mentioned to me that she is 'possibly' going to let me go. So when she did tell me that they will no longer be needing me I was polite and understanding; I hate causing scenes that I know will not end well for me. I grabbed my stuff and I left with a smile and thanked my manager for the training and opportunity. 

I have been with them for a month and a half and granted that's not really long but I was just finally getting a rhythm and a routine at work; now I have to start all over again. I was sick and pissed over the weekend. After telling my husband what happened over dinner he was mad too and said it was totally unprofessional. I don't entirely agree with him but I can see where he's going with that.


And though I was hired through a hiring agency it does not mean I get jobs left and right. It took the agency a few weeks for them to find me this job and to send my profile to the company before I got a call saying someone was interested in me. Almost every day I'm looking online and once I find a few places that peaked my interest I would print out my resume and go to town. So far I have found a nice flower shop needing someone part time and a bank teller position as well. If these jobs are posting for more than $9 an hour for pay I will be very happy. There was a job posting for a front desk agent for a hotel that actually was for a housekeeping position at minimum wage...no thank you. Not to sound like I'm above it but I did not go to college to clean hotel rooms; it would be a different manner if I was doing clerical work.

I've been thanking the Lord for the opportunity that I had and giving Him control of my well-being. I know He has something in store for me and I just have to trust in Him. So please send me positive thoughts and prayers. Hopefully I will have some good news soon.