About two weeks ago, Jared fell and fractured his wrist. It looks nasty when you are looking at the x-rays. He had to go to a hand doctor to see if we needed surgery or not; he said it's preferable. I should explain that my husband has never broken a bone, never went through surgery, and/or anesthesia. So this has become a domino effect of firsts for him. Hubby was not happy. He was trying to find a way out of surgery but the hand specialist warned that if he doesn't go through with it there's a very good chance that around 35-40 years of age, he's going to have painful arthritis on his wrist. The bones would heal but there could be painful consequences down the road.
In the end, Jared agreed that it would be more responsible to go through with it. All morning of the surgery he was pins and needles, no pun intended, and I felt so bad for him. I remember my first time and going under was scary at first. Anyways, the surgery went well and I've updated our family about it. He was so brave and I was proud of him for overcoming his fears.
We didn't find out until later that his parents would get nauseas with the anesthesia and sure enough Jared became extremely sick and dizzy. For a thirty minute drive home it took us twice as much time because he was getting car sick. As soon as we got home he took an hour and a half nap; I had to wake him back up to eat some soup (poor guy hadn't eaten all day) and give him his meds for the pain.
The next day he woke up feeling much better and was wanting to go to town with me (I was going to get groceries and a few things). I tried to explain to him that he just got out of surgery and he's going to be tired and loopy from the meds. He fought me and I had no choice but to consent. Sure enough he got sleepy in the car so I just left him in there while I got groceries. The rest of the day he napped and ate, and napped and ate again until bedtime.
That was Friday. It's Sunday and for the past two days he's dying to get our bathroom project done and it's stressing me out. As much as I also want to get our bathroom done I want him to rest and recuperate, but he won't listen to me. If anyone knows my husband, they would know he can be quite stubborn. Lord knows I love the man to death but his stubbornness has caused a few fights between us.
Now, understand that I'm not complaining about taking care of my husband. I love doing it. I love helping him! BUT it does not help me when I've got a dog who is chewing off his bandages for his hotspots, taking care of our horse's trough since I thought it was leaking water, and my husband who doesn't listen to me and rest and/or take his meds when I tell him to.
I suppose he's really doing well if he's got the energy and strength to stain cabinets and clean the bathroom. I just didn't expect him to bounce back until Monday or Tuesday. Now I'm certainly not letting him get on ladders and scraping wallpaper or anything that would be extra work; he's agreed to only do easy stuff. I constantly check on his pain and he says its just a dull, minor pain.
I know that this was a challenge that God put forth on us to guide us to further understand each other. This was a new experience for the both of us. I've never really took care of another person after they've gone through surgery or a painful procedure; it has been the other way for me growing up. It was nice, for a while, to feel needed by someone else and taking care of them for a change. It was certainly a new 'grown-up' experience for me and I'm happy, despite the struggles I've been going through, to have gone through this challenge. And I know it's been a struggle for Jared too. He usually doesn't like me helping or taking care of him because it makes him feel dependent. He's still learning to let go of his independent tendencies even after being with me for more than four years.
The night we got home from the hospital and we got him in a comfortable position, he wrapped his unbroken arm around me and said, "Thank you baby. You are so amazing for helping me get through it." It brought me to tears hearing him admit that he was thankful of my help. When I remind myself of that it helps me keep going and try not to fight him how I want things done but to work on a compromise for the both of us.
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